So there is one other guy in my life. Yo…
So there is one other guy in my life. You have heard about the internet guy that I havent met.. but theres another one. Ive talked him a LOOONG time ago on here I think..but not recently.
One of my managers at work. He was the first guy I had ever gone farther then kissing with. I started to fall for his personality before this though. He has all the qualities I like in a guy… hes goofy, kinda a dork, hes very cute-not hot. Hes funny and just really nice…before you really know him that is…
So after he realized I was starting to like him, he made his move. And we hooked up. And he has a girlfriend. And I knew that, but i did it anyways. And I fell even harder for him. And i think since he was my first (we still havnt fucked, but everything else) I can’t get over him. And I dont even love him. I just like him a lot and i like being around him and doing stuff with him and I like his personality still, the one before i knew his asshole, manipulative side.
Want to know how he is an manipulative asshole? Well besides the fact that he was cheating on his girlfriend, he constantly fucks with my head. He gets me to do things for him because he knows I wont say no to him. Work related stuff, or otherwise. He tells me he loves me all the time.
Why I am confessing all this now? I had a long talk with a guy I work with, who is his friend, last night. He asked me why I liked him so much and all this. He told me that my guy, actually broadcasts how much he fucks with me. He tells him and others how he tells me he loves me, and how its a bullshit just to get me to do stuff for him.. wow. Im so stupid. I knew he was using me.. but its embarassing knowing that everyone else knows too..
While Im at it.. ill get this out too. Because i havent told anyone this. He has pretty much.. idk if raped is too strong of a word here.. but whatever. He has.. I mean, i dont know if it makes it okay since i have willingly done it before.. but once, after I decided I wanted to stop messing with him, he wanted me to do stuff to him. I didnt want to, and I told him no.. this was after work btw, after we both got done closing. I told him no, he said come on, stop being a punk, and got in my truck in the passangers side, after i was already in the drivers seat. He got in, shut the door. I kept telling him no, to get out..he unzipped his pants. He forced me to do it… ugh. How can I still have feelings for him after something like that?
But honestly, after last night, after i heard about the stuff he talks about. And how much i know he lies to me now, and after reading everything i just wrote, i dont care. Im fucking done with this douschebag. Hes the biggest regret of my life, and im fucking done.
Posted in: Uncategorized
thallie 5:41 pm on November 16, 2009 Permalink | Log in to Reply
This guy sounds like a dick, and rape is the correct term there. Unwanted sexual contact. You said no. That, by the law’s standards, is enough to be classified as non-consensual.
Good on you for breaking it off with him. Don’t let him push you around. I’m glad that you’re being strong and pissed off — that is DEFINITELY what you need to be. Don’t let him scare you.
Cornholio 12:59 am on November 18, 2009 Permalink | Log in to Reply
Hug: Now that I know that you’re 14, I wish you’d gone to the police. This bastard ought to be locked up and ass-raped every day.
secondchancesx3 1:08 pm on November 18, 2009 Permalink | Log in to Reply
me? im not 14. im 19. I was 18 when this happend.
Cornholio 7:07 pm on November 18, 2009 Permalink | Log in to Reply
Sorry I mixed you up with someone else. He still deserves to be locked up and ass-raped every day for what he did to you.
secondchancesx3 11:06 pm on November 18, 2009 Permalink | Log in to Reply
lol yea. and thanks, me too. like ugh..not even just the physical part…but like emotionally…who tells a girl who is head over heels for him that he loves her when he doesnt? Then laughs about it and tells his friends all about it? Thats what gets me the most.. like omg. Its horrible. Im glad I found out though, because I think I am starting the healing proccess, and starting to move on!!