idk what to do my girl friends ex seems …
idk what to do my girl friends ex seems to be falling apart over their friend who died
i think he was in love with her but he’ll never admit it and he seems so depressed ive never seen it before i dont know him long but this is over kill
he plays her songs he tells her stories and when they talk she seems concerned but he constantly just says “i dont matter dont worry about me are you alright” it scares me that some one has such a low sence of self worth that they wont even let others feel sympathy or worry for them
or am i just panicing too much?? ive never lost some one that close to me is it natural?? i mean its been about 4 years seems to me he shouldnt react this way anymore???
i dont know if i should try to help or leave him to this self loathing???
i’ll sleep on it! or try to i havent been able to sleep yet thinging of him hes a decent guy not a saint but good you know and hes not my competitor for her affection like i once thought but sleep everything looks better after sleep
quiteabitch 6:54 pm on July 27, 2010 Permalink | Log in to Reply
Damn Jack…. I talked to him all day and never did he come up with the pain you’re telling me about. He just said he wanted to cry and so I tried to comfort him. He said he was just sad for some reason he didnt know. Though he knows that since my friend died I feel too deeply about knowing that someone died even if I dont know them, and that maybe Id cry again. He tells me the same “i dont matter dont worry about me are you alright” thing. I thought it was just his selflessness, but even though he tells me at times that hes shit and all these stuff, I could never think a reason of why such an amazing person would hate themselves so much. Ive been trying to help him up…But it just ends as him saying “Im not going over this again” or “thats bullshit” no matter how much we argue about it.
As to his grieve, their friend who died was his friend, his sister, just like Sarah. I think he was in love with her, just not the romantic way, just the way he loves Sarah, do you get me? Like brother sister way. Theyve been friends for ten years… And when she died they had been like best friends for 5 or 6… So its understandable… Hes really emotional, hes not an average person when it comes to emotions. And death is something each of us take differently, cause its so shocking, so terrifying, so…undecribable…I honstly cant find the words to describe the horror and pain it brings. Some of us move on easily, thinking logically, others block it, try to pretend it never happened, some deny it, some change in a good way, some change in a bad way… Some of us take years and years to get past it, while some of us never really stop grieving…..
His life and the word “easy” are antonyms…Hes got to carry so much emotionally….Hes suffered so much and he has to put up with so much, its like a mixture of dull, gray and pain. I think he could really use a good friend to try to help him too. You should not try to be nice out of nowhere or show pitty, you should try to be friends with him little by little and give him a hand (ofcourse, if you want.).
As his friend(I already knew that you knew that he knows me), I apreciate your worrying and caring when you really have no obligation to do so, and I agree, he is a good guy and he doesnt deserve so much shit or slef-loathe.
Pd: I also want you to get clear that anything that you write in here stays here and that it’s something I respect and that I wont tell him about a single thing you write unless you ask me to or if I need his advice in order to help you.
quiteabitch 10:17 am on July 28, 2010 Permalink | Log in to Reply
Btw, have you talked to him today? Im worried about him.
adeafmute 1:03 pm on July 28, 2010 Permalink | Log in to Reply
no i havent spoken to him today sarah has text him a few times shes worried i think tho hes saying hes fine
i know hes been thru shit but idk how to help or if i should try me and sarah been arguing bout it for a while now (not fighting just arguing) idk
quiteabitch 1:46 pm on July 28, 2010 Permalink | Log in to Reply
Well, what has Sarah said about it?
adeafmute 2:09 pm on July 28, 2010 Permalink | Log in to Reply
nothing much just has that look on her face you know the one where people are telling you something but you think its a lie so you worry about what the truth is
quiteabitch 2:15 pm on July 28, 2010 Permalink
he tells me hes fine too… No matter what I say.
adeafmute 2:20 pm on July 28, 2010 Permalink
have you tried not asking???
i mean sometimes when people insist something is wrong others wont talk but if you give them the opertunity to talk they do
quiteabitch 4:26 pm on July 28, 2010 Permalink
He just told me hes grieving for their friend this month specially.