The mind of a human is interesting. As I delve into thoughts of grief, it comes to me that, even when there are set stages of grieving and emotional progression, there are differences. Some people stay in denial for years, while others quickly cycle through the other emotions into depression. Some accept loss quickly and […]
Continue reading The mind of a human is interesting As…
God, I’ve gotten so depressed and hopeless in finding someone that I don’t care about anything anymore. There is this one girl though.. but 1. She lives in a city next to me 2. She might be leading me on. I hope not.. I don’t think I could take something like that right now.. so […]
Continue reading God I’ve gotten so depressed and hopeless in…
The best advice I can give to you is that it’ll happen when it’s supposed to.
Don’t wait around for it to come to you, it feels like forever when you do that. Find something to distract your mind because you never know, you might actually meet someone special via an extra curricular activity.
I can also assure you of one thing. When you do meet that person, whether they’re right or wrong, permanent or temporary, if they make you happy in the here and now, it’ll suddenly make sense why it took so long for you to meet them. There’s this euphoric sense of how it all flows and fuses together in some kind of poetic path and you’ll be grateful for it happening when it happens.
Just be patient. Everything happens for a reason : )
I second what AsKnownAs wrote, I really couldn’t have said it better myself.
I wanna add too the following: She might be leading you on, but I think that you should take the risk to try to date her, I mean, if you don’t take risks it will be very hard to find someone…Especially if you are a guy.
And second, you are not alone. I’ve felt the same way myself and many, many people I’ve known have had the same trouble. It’s okay. And well yeah, try new stuff and don’t be afraid. It will be over eventually =) We are here to support you.
I understand what you are going through, I do. I can’t say I understand all of it because I can never relate to 12 years of misery since I only went through 2 and a half years of misery, but I love you and I want to make sure that you are leaving for the […]
Continue reading I understand what you are going through I…
I live a gigantic lie. I put on a mask of confidence and happiness around all of my friends, family, and girlfriend. I wake up every day grabbing for a tablet of xanax and a cigarette to stave off morning panic attacks, with usually 2 or 3 more doses during the day to stay emotionally averted. […]
Continue reading I live a gigantic lie I put on… You keep telling me to stop being so negative. But its hard, when everyone and everything has eventually let me down. Including you.
Continue reading You keep telling me to stop being so neg… Hah. How stupid am I? Thinking that you wanted to be around me. No. I’m too needy and annoying. Too high maintenance. Because wanting to be around you because I love you is being needy. And no, why would you be straightforward with me? Why say “No, I don’t want to hang out” when you […]
Continue reading Hah. How stupid am I? Thinking that you …
My second confession already… I don’t even know what to confess really, just talking about M depresses me, and makes me want to talk about him. I guess that in itself is a confession, I need him still. I am in a healthy, loving relationship and yet the thought of M can still send me […]
Continue reading My second confession already… I don’t…
So…. I know where you’re comming from. And I think M is no good for you. I kknow its really hard to accept it, but you should have your relationship and take the chance to be loved in a good and healthy relationship. He obviously is a douchebag. Sometimes think just arent meant to be… I think that if you really put effort on it, you can be happy without the one you love.
It’s late, and I feel like I’ve wasted yet another day of my fading childhood. I just don’t know how to be happy anymore… I just know how to work. And work. And work. And I’m not happy then either. I’m rather confused, anymore. Male attention is nice, I guess, playing the piano used to bring […]
Continue reading It’s late, and I feel like I’ve wasted…
So… I can relate a lot to you. I had a time too, in which I felt so bored and dull and nothing, no matter what would make me excited or make me dream. I felt the same as you did with your piano but with my guitar. What I did was try to do all the contrary as my past in whcih I had so much depression and pain. I tried to change my routine and do different things than I usually did. Such as painting, trying to learn songs that Im crazy about on my guitar instead of just easy ones. I tried to make everything I did a little special even if it was in the smallest way. The feeling started to fade away, a lot more when I started school. Maybe you should try to see the work not as work but as a bonus for going out and doing something like facing a brand new day every day. I too, work like an animal at school. But I do know why I do it. I do it cause I want to have the opportunity to study outside the country. Im sick of the place where I live, where people are ignorant and everything is dull. The guilt. Guilt of not working is very normal, you should ask yourself why you feel guilty. What’s the result of not working? And then the contrary of the answer for that question, you might work so much cause you want something, or dont want something specific to happen. Im sorry if its too confusing, I just cant find other words to explain :S
It makes a lot of sense, and it’s nice to hear that someone can relate. I’ll definitely take your advice. 
On another note, I’ve studied for a summer ourside of the States, and found it rather refreshing. You should go for it, it’s so much fun to do!
i thought about confessing what i’m feeling right now, but i rather just know this - what makes you get up every morning? what helps you deal with loss, whether it be of love or of life? what makes you turn away from giving up? i need an answer and i don’t know who to […]
Continue reading i thought about confessing what i’m fee…
It varies. What makes me get up, is I can’t stay in bed. No matter how much I may want to.
I’ve never had much loss to deal with, but I generally don’t deal with it well. I dig at the problem, try and find out as much as I can. It rarely works.
And what keeps me from giving up is my friends. I don’t have much faith in family any more. So I put my faith in the people I choose to care about, and in the fact that the world keeps going. That as long as you keep going with it, there’s a chance things get better. And sometimes I let myself give up for a bit, just to remind myself what it’s like. To remind myself why I don’t want to do it.
I’m bisexual. I keep telling myself that nobody will care, but I’m too afraid to tell anybody. My family and my friends will just judge me; they’ll think of me differently. It’s been haunting me since I started college last semester. I’ve sat around doing nothing just thinking about it. My grades are terrible, my […]
Continue reading I’m bisexual. I keep telling myself tha…
I know what your going through, somewhat, at least. It does suck. :l
You could always do what I did.
Start out by telling someone else whos into the same sex, someone you can trust.
That way you have someone to talk to about things and once your ready start telling your close friends.
You know, some people might say, “Oh, it’s no big deal. It’s just ONE part of you. It doesn’t define your entire being” but it’s hard not to think about it all the time, isn’t it? It’s hard because you know it’s the one part of you that might mean you’ll be liked less, loved less, for who you are. I sometimes start to hate myself because I know my parents will hate me for it, or my friends will see me differently.
I hope you know there’s no pressure to tell anyone yet. You can tell someone once you feel and know that you’re ready. That might be next week, next month, next year, who knows.
Does your college have a LGBT support group? It’s generally an anonymous place and it might help make you feel a bit less afraid.
Thanks for the kind words.
My college has a very large percentage of LGBT people attending; in fact, the city it is in has a reputation for it. But I’m not a very social person. I have a tendency to have panic attacks when too much attention is drawn to me, so I tend to avoid group things. That’s why I feel like I can’t really tell anyone because I have this nagging feeling that I’ll suddenly break down one day. I’m an incredibly emotionally unstable person. And I know that my few male friends are going to get distant, because that’s how they were with another of my close friends that came out.
i wish i had something special about me that was eye catching and unique. something that made me interesting. whether it was being extremely brave and carefree or compassionate or trusting. i’m none of these and i feel useless.
Continue reading i wish i had something special about me …
are you Pisces? I would be willing to bet there is something eye catching and interesting about you.
We all have something! Look deep within and you will find it!
sagittarius.
and no.. i dont.
i told you i would never cut again. but im still doing it. I told you i heard voices threatening the people i love and myself….you made it a joke. that will hurt more than you’ll ever know, so i guess we’re even now.
Continue reading i told you i would never cut again. but …
I want to kill myself. I have wanted to kill myself for as long as I could remember. I attempted suicide when I was 17 and my mother came in to talk to me about God and how if you do bad things doesn’t mean you’re a bad person and that God always forgives, then […]
Continue reading I want to kill myself. I have wanted to …
maybe you need to talk to someone, like a therapist. it’s horrible letting people know you go to therapy, but maybe that’s the best for your safety. it’s good that you love your family, hold on to that.
I got a job just over a week ago and I am already thinking about quitting. It’s at a newspaper, so tangentially in my field (I was an English major), but I’ve already realized I absolutely suck at working on my own and staying self motivated, and I don’t really like doing legwork or interviewing […]
Continue reading I got a job just over a week ago and I a…
I understand. I’ve had both jobs with too much and too little responsibility and they were both hell in different ways.
I think the problem is that the best things in life aren’t jobs, that’s why people get paid to do them. Not much consolation to those of us who need to work.
I’ve actually toyed with the idea of becoming a career counsellor or something like that. Now, having said what I just did about jobs, I don’t think I could, in good conscience…
Here we go again. 
Good luck.
This is my 10th year of being so depressed that I think about death. I know there are people out there who are worse off but the shit that has happened to me is still big. It’s gotten to much now, I can’t deal with my father hitting me again or telling me i am […]
Continue reading This is my 10th year of being so depress…
If you need to talk about the rape, I will listen. It seems to be under your skin and in the back door to every decision you make
I can’t handle my emotion any more so i block them all now I fear I will never again be truley happy
Continue reading I can’t handle my emotion any more so i…
I’m so sorry.
Talking helps, I promise.
Vent on here, or to the people who love you.
It will be ok once you let it out.
it really hard for me to just let it out
my memorey is a scaring one and i am scared it will just return itself
as history does so many times
If someone doesn’t stop me, I will hurt myself.
Continue reading If someone doesn’t stop me, I will hurt…
Please, don’t hurt yourself. You deserve better.
i’ll stop you then.
Please know that I love you. You mean more to me than anything in the world, more than life itself. You are the reason I’m still alive. I’d die for you, I’d do anything for you. You make me happier than I’ve been in years. I want you to know that my bouts of depression […]
Continue reading Please know that I love you. You mean mo…
The best way would be to learn to love yourself for who you are. He may make you stronger, but being able to stand strong on your own won’t cheapen that. In fact, by learning to love yourself, you stand to learn better how to love him, and show that love.
It’s over. I can’t believe my greatest fear has been realized & you don’t even have the courage to admit it to my face. Instead, you try to convince me that I’m too emotionally unstable & completely illogical & they are the source of all these “crazy” thoughts & accusations. And all this time you […]
Continue reading It’s over. I can’t believe my greatest…
I think that what you aren’t understanding is that what is unstable and illogical to one person may not be to another. Yes people will use whatever they can in a pinch against you. I would like to know what you were thinking and accusing this person of doing?
I miss you so much and each day without you hurts. I can’t just “take a break” from you and wait until you get better and then see if we still want to be together, whatever that means. You won’t explain to me what you meant. I’m glad we still talk but it’s hard to […]
Continue reading I miss you so much and each day without …
i know what you mean by this, and im afraid there is nothng you can do about how you are feeling. ive felt the same for almost 2 years. But i figured its better to have him as a friend than not at all. Maybe in the future, things will change, and be the way you want them to be. Don’t give up.
- Shannon
ScrewEverything 9:38 pm on November 9, 2011 Permalink | Log in to Reply
I really like this, a lot. <3