I hate people who complain. Get the fuck over it and keep on truckin’. Life will not wait on you. Why should you linger trying to fix or figure out things that have passed? There is absolutely no reason!
Tagged: sadness RSS
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ClosetAthiest
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Ineedahug.
My little brother killed himself 3 years ago. I still have a really hard time dealing with it, but can’t bring myself to talk to anyone else about it. I can’t afford a therapist, and I don’t see any reason why I should burden anyone else with my problems and negative feelings. But truth be told, I find myself thinking about killing myself a lot more often than I want to, and it scares me. And more often than I want to admit, I really, really need a fucking hug.
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SlowlyRising
I would gladly give you a hug if I could. Being able to tell other people about your problems isn’t burdening, it’s a sign you trust and care about them. Talk to someone in person.
You need to stop thinking about suicide. I don’t think it’s what you really want, and more importantly, I don’t think it’s what your brother would want.
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quiteabitch
HUUUGSGGSSSSS!!
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La
I’m sorry. Hugs
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nothing but me
If I could I would hug you till your bones crack
Love
S.
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demon
I can’t handle my emotion any more so i block them all now I fear I will never again be truley happy
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forget then
I’m so sorry.
Talking helps, I promise.
Vent on here, or to the people who love you.
It will be ok once you let it out.-
demon
it really hard for me to just let it out
my memorey is a scaring one and i am scared it will just return itself
as history does so many times
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itsme1
I have tried being happy lately. I really do hate being down and I am normally an upbeat person. I am usually telling my wife to be more positive…The truth is, I hate my life. I feel like the last 14 years have been a waste. I messed up and put myself in a situation where I am living where I do not want to live. I have a job that I hate and can’t find another one. I feel like I am a failure as a father. There is nothing that I want more than a “Do Over” button.
I know that isn’t possible, but I can’t get my mind off of it. I just want to start over. Is there anyone else out there that is over $100,000 in debt and that does NOT include a house? Yup that would be me.
I am trapped and I feel like there is no way out. There is no light at the end of the tunnel. Life is just going to continue to suck until the day I die. Heck, the way things are going for me, the way I die will suck too. It will probably be some long drawn out and painful thing.
Hope…I want it. I want to believe that there is something better. That it will get better. If you knew me, you would never believe that I feel this way. I have gotten really good at acting positive and happy. I have even had people tell me that they wish they could be positive like me, that they look to me as an example of this. If they only knew the truth. Inside, I am a wreck.
I get up in the morning and dread going to work. At the end of the day, I dread going home. The only place I wish I could be is where I consider home.
I never get to go there…She finds a reason why we can’t go. Not that they aren’t legitate reasons…but she always finds them. I don’t think she does it on purpose, but she does it.
I want happiness.
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GraingerGuy
You’re seriously $100K in debt? Credit card debt? Time for bankruptcy my friend. It’ll get the creditors to stop calling and will give you a plan and peace of mind. Call an attorney. That’s one way to start.
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Y ask Y
Hey man. It’s never too late. There’s a saying that you have to eat an Elephant in small bites. Right now I’m sure it looks insurmountable, but even the smallest step towards change might create an Avanlanche towards something greater.
There’s truth in your post, and certainty. The certainty is that if you don’t make a change of some kind, you’re right, your life is guaranteed to be ass until the grave. Hope will come from change, man. It won’t just fall out of the sky. And that’s frightening and it’s shit and it sucks, but that’s how it is.
I don’t know about the debt. But I do know about no having much money to go around. The money has nothing to do with your ability to interact with your kids. Being a great dad is free. It’s just a matter or perspective, and if you don’t have money, ingenuity. You can do it.
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bobburgster
file for bankruptcy
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motivational_poster
today is just the hardest damn day
if i can go an hour without a crying fit, i think i might just be OK
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carbonlifeform
Today my boyfriend almost broke up with me. It’s funny, I had been somewhat fed up with the relationship and the thought of ending it had been crossing my mind. It didn’t exactly sadden me, either. It was almost a relief. He moved 150 miles away a few weeks ago and things have been tough for us. We were arguing on a regular basis about ridiculous things. The problem isn’t the arguing so much as the sheer, unwavering tenacity on both our ends. Neither of us is willing to give in. Eventually we just give up and agree to move on. The unfortunate part of it is when we’re together, we’re in the clouds. We rarely disagree on anything. He drove into town last night and everything was great. Exactly like it always is. This morning was the same. He tried to show me a new show and halfway through I announced that the bad acting made it almost unbearable to watch. I loved the concept, but the actors we’re awful. He took it personally, I found his reaction silly. We fooled around and I playfully tried to lift up his shirt and kiss his chest. He wouldn’t let me. Irritated, I pressed on. Should I have just stopped? Probably, but I couldn’t understand how he could be so put off over something so minor. Well, it turned into a blowout. Angry that I kept trying to push his buttons (which I shamefully admit I did), he scolded me and told me I just didn’t know when to quit. Upset that he acted so harshly to such a minor little annoyance, I completely shut him out. Lying in his bed next to each other, he told me he just couldn’t stand the arguments anymore. He gave up. In shock, I got up and asked him to drive me home. He did. I was in a state of sadness and confusion. I couldn’t believe that man I loved, the one that had told me he would happily endure every chaotic event or disaster for just a few moments with me, had given up so easily. “I don’t like this. I don’t understand. I’ve done everything I can to be so supportive of your life, your career, your education. Everything to be the best girlfriend to you. If you can give up this easily over something so ridiculous, then maybe you’re just not worth it.” He screamed at me that I was too stubborn and proud to admit I was wrong (true). When I tried to defend myself and point out that he had wronged me as well, he just said “it’s over. It’s fucking over. Can’t you just see that we butt heads too much?! We just need to realize we’re not what the other needs.” I didn’t understand why, but those feelings of contempt and annoyance I had been feeling before he had visited me were nowhere to be found. I felt like the wind had been knocked out of me. My mouth went dry. I thought I was going to throw up. He dropped me off and drove away. The tears that had escaped me earlier suddenly found me. I walked up the stairs, turned around and ran after him. He didn’t see me. I found my phone and called, asked him to please come back and talk to me. He did. I knew if I didn’t throw my pride out the window that I’d lose one of the greatest loves I’d ever known. I promised him with every racing breath I had that I would do anything in my power to make a conscious effort to be more agreeable and understanding. I’d stop when he said no, accept criticisms with an open heart and mind. I’d do everything I could to prove to him that we had the potential to be something amazing, something we both had acknowledged several times before. For the first time in my life, I begged a man to stay with me. We cried, we kissed, we both agreed that the moments we’ve shared don’t happen to people often and we’d be cheating ourselves by quitting so carelessly. He drove back home, I stayed here. We haven’t spoken much since then, I believe his phone is dead. As happy as I am that things aren’t over, and as much as he’s reassured me that he loves me and he knows everything will work out alright, the words “it’s over” echo in my mind and cut through me deeper than any word ever has. He told me he didn’t mean it, but I wonder if anything he ever said to me was true. How could he say it so easily if he’d told me time and time again he’d hoped we’d spend the rest of our lives together? I just feel betrayed and insecure. I don’t know if I’ll be able to get over this day. Even though we’re still together, in that moment, he broke my heart.
Maybe it’s karma.
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Cavalary
From what you’re saying, he’s right, you know? And you seem to admit it too… Seems to me like you took his assurances to mean that you can get away with everything and tried to do just that, so maybe something like this is just what you both needed.
There can be a certain degree of constructive arguments and perhaps even a certain degree of butting heads for no other reason than because it’s how you “work” without problems because that’s just how some people are (myself included - though not in a relationship; bar a few crucial issues, with her I’d just shrug and give in, it was too important to risk over differences of opinion on non-critical issues, which is something you may need to learn), but when it gets to basically just aggravating the other on purpose or even just putting minor issues in front of the relationship, that can’t work.
Think of it as a new start, if he’s truly willing to give it another go. But TALK about it, A LOT!
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SolomonTummler
I’m trying to keep from being depressed. For once I’ve had happiness for longer than 4 minutes. It’s been a week and I’ve been happy. So happy I’ve been paranoid.
I just want to keep being happy…after 2 years of depression, I need to be happy.
I need to be around people that can help me be happy.
I need to love someone else finally…
I’m tired of not being loved or happy.
Skype users/Grouphug Confessionists. (i know it isn’t a word.)
Put a space in my name to find me.
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lifelost
happiness is strange after depression. dont rush into it. take it in strides. its like withdrawl for lack of something better to phrase it as. you’re so used to being depressed happiness is hurting all at once. take it in strides.
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pd0815
Do the attempts at getting girls to video chat with you ever work?
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SolomonTummler
I don’t ask them to video chat. I just ask to chat in general… and usually it isn’t just girls.
Sometimes it does. If it doesn’t, I’m not bothered. For the most part I just look for people to talk to
You’re really bad at trolling by the way.
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pd0815
that’s because i’m not a troll.
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LoveIsAllAroundYou
I never thought anyone like you could exist. You’re my everything. I’m in love with you. I know you like me, but I’m so afraid to tell you I love you. Thanks to you, I feel free. I broke up with my ass of a boyfriend, I learned to stop listening to my father’s awful criticism, I’m over the other ‘him’, and I’m slowly getting happier with life. You’re always there. You care about others way above yourself. I only wish we lived closer. I would give you all the love I had. You are a much more wonderful person than you give yourself credit for. Much more…
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LoveIsAllAroundYou
I haven’t seen you in years. You live in a different state. I just talked with you on Facebook. I’m in love with you. You’re one of the kindest people I’ve ever met. You’re caring, understanding, and don’t hang onto the bad things too much. I wish I could be with you. The worst part is that I know I will never be able to be with you.
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poeticxheart
i understand how you feel. I met someone a few years ago, he lives in a different state and joined the marines. I just finished skyping with the guy I’m in love with who might be getting deployed soon.
I wish you the best and try to think positively! Merry Christmas
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LoveIsAllAroundYou
Really? That’s really sad. I’m glad to know I’m not the only one who feels this way. I hope all goes well with your man! Thank you, and hope you had a merry Christmas as well!
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everyoneneedstime
Unrequited love is something that no one should have but something that everyone endures.
I can say that I have never had my heart broken. Don’t get me wrong, I have had my share of girlfriends. I think I was too scared to get my heart broken. I’m not very open with my feelings, so if someone is able to get close to me, then they are in. I’ve been an asshole. I know. I wish that I could change. I want to change. I hurt them before they could hurt me. I was scared to give myself fully.
So, I doubt this “unrequited” love. I’m not sure if it really is there or if it’s something I’ve dreamed up to make myself feel better. I wish I have the strength to move on even though this feels so real. What makes it harder is that even though I have told her, I didn’t want her to answer. I felt that I need to tell her but I was too scared to know what she would say. I regret that. I didn’t want her to think about it or cause her any more confusion than she already is in. This is my burden. I will have to endure it until forever.
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bornwrong
Ever since I was little, I never cared about my appearance. I was born with horrendous teeth, one sticking out and the others mashed together in a hodge podge all over the place- to make it worse, I had a dentist tell me it was the worst case he had seen. That hurts when you are little.
Years go by, I build up an immunity and stop caring. Until Halloween rolls around.
I work in a very big convenience store- all the employees were allowed to dress up! I was so excited! I spent two hours before work dressing up like a zombie, tearing up a set of work clothes as a joke, splattering them with fake blood- the whole nine yards.
I get to work, it was going great, until two hours into a 10 hour shift I hear the phrase “Wow, those teeth look so real!” It hurt so bad. So very deep.
Now I realize I’ve been lying to myself this whole time. I hate how I look, and I hate that my Fiance has to look at it everyday. Sometimes I wonder if he just stays with me because I am his first.
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Dan-Yella
Crooked teeth shouldn’t matter. Anyone who judges you about your teeth or any other flaw you may have, are superficial and are just trying to make themselves feel better.
My ex had a black front tooth. Do you think I cared?
Look beyond these things. Your Fiance clearly does!
Daniela
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bornwrong
The sad part was it wasn’t intended as an insult. The customer that said it to me was trying to compliment the execution of the outfit.
If it had been an insult, I could have glazed it over, rolled it off my back and gone on. But it was the honesty and the sincerity which the customer thought were fake teeth that hurt so much.
No, looks shouldn’t matter- but everyone has something about themselves they wish they could change, alter, or even do away with.
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thallie
I have never seen you, but from this post, I think that you are beautiful (:
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FunnyRain
Me and my best friend have been going strong for quite awhile now. We even had a celebration recently.
But even though we seem like two of the most down to earth people, me and her have been falling out a lot. Normally i wouldn’t be bothered because we get back to our old selves in no time.
Our latest argument resulted with me lashing out at her whilst drunk because of a girl that betrayed her not to long ago. It might have been jealousy or just simple annoyance but i told her that i was sick of her and her constant mood swings. Which she does have a lot, i have been supportive and have always held back on my problems to listen to hers as she is going through a really tough time but whilst drunk i thought she was creating problems for herself. At most times it seems like that.
For the past couple of months she doesn’t seem to care about anyone but herself.
In all our previous fights i was the one to come and sort it all out as i hate unresolved conflicts but i don’t want to do this anymore, i just cant take feeling like shite because of her.
Half the time, because of our arguments i get self destructive and do really stupid things which i regret the next morning. This time it got so bad that i got to a stage i never gotten to before but at the right moment freaked out and stopped.
I really miss her and it hasn’t even been a week… and i think i might just be going insane without her to talk too.
But at the same time i don’t want to be the one always coming back to her.
I feel so lost.. i need someones good advice.-
southbeachyanira
im in a little stint with my bff too…really bad one…but i think the best thing yo can do is to move on. explain to her why you dont want her in your life anymore. its going to be hard, painfull, and just down right suffering almost everyday. you’ll want to pick up the phone and call and check facebook but forget that. and that saying its going to get worse before it gets better? its true. it really fucking sucks. but i would reather go throught the worst and get better than just be in a cycle of bad my whole life.
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noname
So I have this problem, a kind of normal problem I guess.
I’m still in love with my ex boyfriend.
We started dating August 20th and we were on and off for 9 months. I never gave him head, but I let him take my virginity. After he took my virginity he decided head was more important and left me for some other girl.
That was the first time I ever experienced a heart break.
He came back for me because he still “loved” me. After I took him back, he did it again. Except this time he went on a date with the girl while him and I were still dating, so I proceeded to dump him.
That was the second time I experienced a heart break.
We still talk, and sometimes we’re best friends. This summer we went to warped tour together and it was amazing. On the way home he told me that he still loved me and he chose the girl he’s with now only because I chose the guy I’m with now. That’s bullshit. Whenever we talk he says it’s my fault and if I didn’t dump him that day we’d still be together.
Oh how i wish i didn’t dump him.
Now several months since the last time we we’re together, i have a boyfriend. Don’t get me wrong, i am so so happy, and i do love my current boyfriend, but sometimes I get into these moods where all I want is my old boyfriend. I want things the way they we’re a year ago. He has a girlfriend and I have a boyfriend. I know that if i wanted to i could have sex with him. Although, that’s not what i want. My parents hate him, my friends hate him, my current boyfriend hates him and his girlfriend hates me. There is so much friction between us.
I’m just not sure how to feel.
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Dan-Yella
I’m in a slightly similar situation.
Except, we broke up after 9 months for fighting over the most irrelevant things that just weren’t important. The thing is, we still remain friends in the hopes of working things out.
That’s when it gets sticky. He doesn’t know what he wants it seems, because one minute he can be cold and distant and then the next, we’ll hug eachother, and everything feels just right.
Its so much easier to just fall into a pattern, rather than moving on. And although you have moved on it doesn’t seem like you’re over your ex. Maybe if you had some single, alone time, you might be able to clear your thoughts.
All the best.
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padyirishman
hiya wana chat
padyirishmanatyahoodotcodotuk
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_wasted_
I hate my life. Im super nice to everyone all the time. I bend over backwards for anybody is they need it. Im always a shoulder to fucking cry on to any sobby bitches. Does anyone consider me a friend? No. Do I ever get a call whenever anything is going or people are hanging out? No. Would anybody notice if I disappeared off the face of this earth? No. Maybe people would be like *Oh, wheres that girl, now we have nobody to manipulate* Maybe its because Im fucking fat. I never get asked to hang out anywhere, so Im stuck at home with my parents all the time, and all they can talk about is how much weight Ive put on, and how I should try and lose it, and *Oh, you were so much prettier when you were thin* THANKS. THANKS TO EVERYONE FOR FUCKING ME OVER.
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Synthetic_Eden
Hello, my friend. You and I share lives, more or less. It’s an awful feeling, but I hope you trust me when I say that it does get better. In small amounts, it will. And those amounts will build up. And one day you will wake up and realize, “…I feel great today. I’ve felt great all week.”
I know that you’ll feel it soon, I just know it. -
2468230
“Never make someone a priority when they only make you an option” a great quote from some dickhead i dont give two fucks who name is. if you want to be thin go and work to be thin, i know its hard to just mentally do it but after a few days it helps. once you can say fuck everybody, only then will people really want to be with you. its strange but so are people, they always want what they cannot have.
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deionara
I met someone and fell in love with him, but now we live in different countries and since we were apart, we grew apart. He ended this a few days ago and since then I felt empty, sad, sorrowful and numb. I just wish I was with him, wish I hadn’t invested so much in this relationship, wish I was indifferent, wish there were many other guys I could have such amazing sex with and feel so deeply for…
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El_Scorcho
That’s it. It’s over. After one hell of a year and two months, you finally left me. I can’t really believe it. I don’t want to. I’m such a fucking idiot for the things i’ve done. I’m such a self centred dick for the things i’ve thought. I’m such a insensitive cunt for the things i’ve said. Even if all of those, were out of panic for losing you. Ironicly. The worrying about losing you, is the thing that made you dump me. You think i don’t know you, but really i memorize every word you say, and hold it closer to my heart than my lungs. You’re the best thing that has EVER happened to me. I will cherish the memories we’ve had together, even if i live far away, and therefore we don’t have as many good ones as most couples. I hope to god that you’ll give me another chance, i’ve learned my lessons. Please. I need you. Or, at least, i need to know you’ll be happier without me. I know i’m only 15. I know you all think you’ll get over it, you’ll think you’ve fallen in love with the next girl that bats her lashes at you. And you’re in a way right, on the first part. But, although i’l learn to love again, i’l never love quite like i love you. Although there are plenty more fish in the sea, i’l never find quite a rare beauty like you. I feel like i’m playing every part of the song Jolene, with the exception of that of the ‘man’. I took my own girl away from me, but i’m begging you to come back.
P.S. You people that don’t mean any harm by saying ‘All you people that are all sad need to grow up and learn to become stronger by your problems!’ annoy the hell out of me. We don’t give a shit, just cause you can manage it, doesn’t mean everyone else can. Lucky, fucking, you.
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Cherry_chapstick7
I can’t really say anything but, “I’m sorry”. I hope things get better.:)
*hug
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joei
“I memorise every word you say and I hold it closer to my heart than my lungs”-
“although there are more fish in the sea. I’ll never find quite a rare beauty like you”
Man that’s beautiful! I sure hope you get your second chance- otherwise she’s the loser!
You’re 15! Hell, as a romantic by the time you’re 18 you’ll be unstoppable!and your PS hits the nail right square on the head.
good luck brother -
kiwi.in.oz
I think you are wrong in your PS. I don’t think they manage it at all, they are probably shut off to emotions because emotions can be scary and uncontollable sometimes.
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heavymetalcows22
I know how you feel. I am only 18, I was with someone from when i was 16 until a couple of months ago. Age makes no difference, don’t let anyone tell you that it does. I love him with all my heart. We never fought, until the last couple of months. Because I was so afraid that it was to good to be true, I was insecure and defensive. He left and said he was unhappy, later I found out that wasnt the reason. But my point is.. If you know you love this person with all of your heart and every drop of your soul, if you love them more than anyone in the universe, then don’t give up. If the love is as true as it sounds, she will realize that you’re wonderful. Some people are just meant to be together, no matter how many times they try to tear themselves apart. I’m still waiting. It hurts, but I know some how some way I’ll get another chance. I hope you do too. I’ll pray for you, whether you believe in God or not, that you find your happiness again. To be happy and in love is unequaled by every other emotion combined. Its bliss, and everyone deserves it. Good luck.
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El_Scorcho
kiwi, I hope you are wrong, but y’know what, i think you’re right.
I’ve tried for a second chance, i mean i’ve really tried. I’ve begged, and begged, to the point just before she starts to think i’m going to become an obsessed psycho killer ex-boyfriend. She won’t. It’s okay though. I don’t deserve one. I treated her like shit, so i shouldn’t have another. She doesn’t love me, so it’s okay that i won’t. She never has. So it’s good. She can find someone she does love now, who won’t treat her like he’s paid for her. Who she can spend time with, share love and laughter with, hug, kiss, and argue with. I just wish that person was me.
heavymetalcows22, I do love her more than anything in the universe, but that’s why i am giving up. Letting a bird out of a cage to be free kind of thing. I feel for you though, cause it seems as if we’re in a similar situation, the difference lies in that I know she is better off without me. By the sounds of things, you two are perfect for each other, and you’re perfectly right. Keep going, keep trying.
But me, i deserve not to be prayed for. I deserve not to be felt for, and with L, i don’t deserve unequaled happiness. Unfortunately, i wouldn’t have it with anyone else.
Oh, and joei, There is no winner in love. It is not a game as much as it may seem like it. It’s the most serious thing in the world. People have killed for it, people have died for it. People still do. Although there is no winner although it is no game, there will always be a loser, and on this occasion, it is me, not her. And now i seem like a patronizing idiot, talking to someone older than him like he has no idea on what love is. I should shut up. My apologies.
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camomile
Better move on .
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Zombeedz
I feel bad because I come on sites like this, and I could never have problems as bad as them, and it feels like I do until I read it. Then I just feel like shit again.
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lollirot
i feel exactly the same
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nothing but me
me too
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AndreaJ
There is never any point in comparing heartaches. Everyone has problems. But it doesn’t do anyone any good to dismiss their own problems on the bases that other people have worse problems. Chances are good that someone somewhere in the world has problems worse than the people you are comparing yourself to now. That doesn’t change the weight of what they are dealing with, does it? Sometimes you just have to allow yourself to feel what you feel by your own standards. Believe me, you do have the right to hurt, and you are worthy of reaching out for help if you need to.
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SolomonTummler
Well…I figure it’s best to admit my problems in their purest form.
A bit more than a year ago, I started a relationship with a girl after breaking free from a relationship that wasn’t working. I was in love with the girl, but the relationship was apparently pretty open. As she went to go date a guy I’ll refer to as “J”. I had a problem with this and when we argued about it. She would say things about how even though she’s dating him, she doesn’t see it working in the future and that she still loves me. I can’t remember how I handled it completely, but I do remember she continued dating him until It stopped working. A while later, I ended up losing my virginity to a woman years older than I. Guilt was eating away at me from the moment I did. Not because I lost it…but because I lost it to a woman I didn’t really love. I took a long shower and regretfully made the call to admit what I had done. This had completely damaged our relationship and It took a considerable amount of time to be forgiven, at least…I thought she forgave me, she said she did. (Aside: It should be noted, that today as I write this, I don’t understand how it got to her, when she was dating a guy anyway.).
After everything calmed down and we were loving again, it got to a point where we would argue a lot. This was attributed to the finals she was preparing for among other stressful things. It also didn’t help that I was also going through a slump of depression and looking for work. Sometime later, she went off to France for two weeks. I missed her a lot, but that didn’t translate too well, because when she called me the time she got home, I didn’t sound extremely happy to hear from her. Granted, I was happy to hear from her, but I was distracted with something at the time…regardless, I didn’t sound excited…and it hurt her very much. I apologized for the way I had been, and she forgave me and said everything was okay…but she didn’t really mean it. I could tell she didn’t mean it because she would sometimes say spiteful things. Like “maybe if I leave for another two weeks you’ll miss me,” Whenever she would say things like that. I would be speechless…I just couldn’t say anything no matter how much I wanted to. Eventually it got to a point where we weren’t talking as much…and she didn’t care anyway.
The icing on the cake was when she asked me “Have you ever considered seeing if someone else would make you happy?” To which I said “No, because I love you!”
She eventually started dating other guys and I got upset. It got to the point where all we could do was indirectly snipe at each other from Myspace Updates. It got to a point where she stopped talking to me alltogether…It ate at me so much. I never felt such a pain in my chest before in my life. The closest thing to it, when I was sitting in a car on the phone with her some time before all this. We were joking around and I said something to the effect of “why don’t you talk to your lovely boyfriend?” To which she said “What?”. I repeated myself and she said “I don’t have a boyfriend…” in a serious tone. It cut me deep…but not nearly as deep as when she left me.
When she left me…she was talking about how she “discovered I didn’t love her as much anymore” and a bunch of other things, which I thought was insane, because I loved her more than anything. I wanted to make this girl my wife someday.
I see her happy with someone else…and I want to die every time. I loved her so much, and even though I made mistakes…I still love her more than she’ll ever love me. It hurts so much whenever I think about her. I get dangerously depressed for periods that last from hours to days to weeks at the thought of her with someone else.
I can’t believe her whenever she says she wishes the best for me…it just never seems real.
Endlessly, I try not to think of the “what if’s” but sometimes…I wonder. “What if I hadn’t done the things I had done or what if I really sounded more excited for her when she returned from France?”
I don’t know what to do anymore… Moving on feels impossible. It’s even more vexing because she moved on with ease. I’m not really in her thoughts anymore.
Trying to be with anyone else just doesn’t work for some reason. It’s like I can’t love them as passionately as I loved her. It’s been a year since she left me…and I hate myself for not being able to let go. I wish I could either forget…or have her back again.
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Remixer
To me it seems both sides were at fault.
However, the majority of the blame does go on your ex.
Dating other guys without considering your feelings, even though you got upset about it.
Getting angry and unforgiving after you had sex with another woman.
These are very strong signs of a woman whom doesn’t have the slightest clue what she is doing. It is because of this hypocritical behaviour and attitude that you both evolved into a state of love and hate wrestling with each other for the dominating position.
From the looks of things, she is not aware of her own mistakes and is extremely self-serving.
If I were to give my honest opinion, I would tell you that you are much better off without her.
Such women are a complete waste of time as they have no real appreciation of how much they hurt others while they solely pay attention to their own hurt feelings.
Obviously being apart from her is extremely painful for you, but I suggest you think more rationally about what has happened.
The strong emotions you currently feel will easily make you blame yourself for everything that has happened, making you think you were completely at fault and driving you into a hellish cycle of depression.
I suggest you snap out of this cycle. Remove yourself from your current world, travel somewhere for a few weeks and keep your mind busy to avoid thinking about her.
The more you think about her, the harder it will be for you to let go.
If you continue on this self-destructive path, there is no telling what you might reduce yourself to.
Always keep in mind that you are a human being with pride. If you don’t have self-respect, attain it.
Grow from this debacle; do not let anything and anyone’s stupidity and selfish perspective on everthing.
It is not worth it and you yourself are worth so much more.
Simply because you have such strong and earnest feelings, you are a rarity in today’s world.
Be happy about this fact. Better yourself and learn to absorb the pain, because life still goes on, even after your heart was broken.
It may all seem hopeless to you, but it isn’t.
If you wish to talk, I am at your disposal.
Cheers
Remixer
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secondchancesx3
i agree with remixer.
but i feel like you did nothing wrong here, and this chick that you were seeing sounds like a bitch who was just using you. i know easier said then done, but you need to let go of someone who treated you so terribly. thats bull, the way she treated you. -
SolomonTummler
What drove me nuts was the overall condescension she would give me from time to time after it all broke down and she found someone new.
She once sent me a note concerning some blogs I had posted saying: “Starting this letter isn’t the easiest thing in the world. But I hope you’ll hear me out. Because I think you should know. I recently read your journals. I always do. Because I care about where you are and how you’re doing.
I don’t hate you. I never did and I never will. You helped me through so much and made me a stronger person, for that I’m thankful. And I think it’s time I put your fears of me hating you to rest. Or having any ill wish towards you at all.
Whether you are willing to accept and listen, which I hope you do, you will always hold a place in my heart. I haven’t forgotten about you. How could I. You meant the world to me once. My feelings of wanting the best for you haven’t gone away. I think nothing terrible of you. Not even when I left.
Things will never be as they were, that’s true. But it doesn’t mean I don’t still think about you every once in a while- hoping that you’re doing well. I do, contrary to conscience thought.
Yes, I did move on but as difficult as it was for you, it was also for me. It was not easy to leave, hence why I stopped all talk entirely. I couldn’t handle it. I felt as though we weren’t growing any more, being the best people we could and so I felt I needed to go. And I’m sorry it hurt you. That was possibly the hardest thing I’ve had to do.
But please, if anything you take from this note, know that you were a significant part of my life and have helped me become a better person, one that I can be proud of. I can only hope I have done the same for you. And know, I still check on you to see how you’re doing. The news of the new band is wonderful and I’m ecstatic for you as well as the new friends you have made.
Again, I don’t hate you. I never did. Know you will always hold a place in my heart.
I only hope the best and happiness for you (name).
That’s all I’ve ever wanted for you.Happy new year,
hope it brings you everything you want.With all my love,
(name)”
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It drove me nuts how someone could say they didn’t love me anymore “with all of their love”.It just felt like a cop-out…like she wrote it to shut me down and make any possible reply from me seem desperate to either hurt her or make her come back to me.
Like she wanted to come out as the bigger person…I felt, and still feel, insulted.
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Reta
yeah, its cruel… and i feel sorry for my ex, because i say i care without wanting to be with him. but really how else can you describe a feeling of a good memory with a not so happy ending? you guys at one time had a great connection but like everything amazing, it didn’t last long.
it sounds like a big cause and effect relationship. she wasn’t sure about you when you two first started dating so saw other guys, hurt you. so in response you found comfort with another women. as an effect she was hurt and felt it was owed to her to be allowed to see other people. a vicious cycle which from the very start was rough but then it caught some momentum and got out of control. both of you lost trust in the other and what relationship can be built from there?
would probably benefit you to ignore her and find someone else or something else for a time to occupy yourself. that love is not one of a kind. in fact there’s better choices, where a woman will love you without doubting her feelings towards you and you to her leaving out any trust issues that evolved from the one you described. now to say all you have to do is ignore her is ideal in theory but in practice is near impossible to pull off. not hearing about the guys shes going around with will be better for you but curiosity is quite devilish.
but really, distraction is probably the best medicine when getting over someone.
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Remixer
I agree.
Distraction will be probably be the best course of action for you.
Remixer
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SolomonTummler
I’ll try…Reta is right though, curiosity is devilish. Its like telling yourself not to look down…you end up looking anyway.
Doesn’t help that she recently said Hi and came to “See how I was doing” on my webpage. Unfortunately, I can’t delete it, but I may hide it.
Should I ignore the comment?
Or should I just say “hello”?
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evaa
I cant stand my face, or my body. I feel ugly, then okay looking, ten ugly. What tops it off though is that whenever go home i feel isolated and lonely. Im in love with one of my good friends even though I know it will never ever happen. Why wont it ever hapen? Cause I’m an ugly beast. I wish I was the pretty girl. Ive always been the weird one. In elementary school I was beaten up for wearing glasses. Now in high school I fee like shit. I have a feeling none of my friends actually like me. If I didn’t think suicide was the lame way out, I would of been dead a long long time ago. Sorry daddy.
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myhomewarddove
hug!
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Aerotan
Sometimes we have to learn to love ourselves before others can learn to love us. If you feel ugly, you’re going to give that impression to other people. But by the same token, if you decide that, no matter how you look you are a beautiful person who can’t be stopped or brought down by other people’s perceptions of you, in turn, other people will see this quality in you, and react to it.
In other words, be your own person and everyone will believe you are as beautiful as you want them to.
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evaa
thanks
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Reta
some times it takes time to have the beauty inside to come out and shine. all through high school and partly through college i felt like the ugly duck then one day i woke up and i was complimented on more than just my mind. not saying it will happen on its own because it took a lot of self-conscious motivation (shallow fears but isn’t that what it is?). you’ll have better years of your life. what good is the best years of your life when its limited to 4?
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evaa
good advice, thank you.
im just going ti firget about the boy, boys are dumb anyways <.<-
Remixer
Not all of us are.
Remixer
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fallforward
If I could give you a hug, I swear.
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immortally.alive
you sound a lil like ME, im 25 though, I have 2 kids, and im a FUCKING weird freak. I have no idea why anyone even has sex with me, i Dont blame my kids dads for abandoning them, i blame my disgusting revolting self. im so ugly, i feel sorry that my kids came out of me, and that they have to see my gross body everyday, im a terrible waste on this earth. im garbage. i hope i die everyday… i’d like to tell u it gets better, but i cant.
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wonder 8:38 pm on June 12, 2010 Permalink | Log in to Reply
Maybe some things take some time and effort to let go and some things are even worth holding onto and fighting for